5 Empowering Ways: How to Build Self Confidence, From a HSP
How to build self confidence when doubting yourself is all too normal? Well, one thing’s for sure–the journey to self confidence can be tricky. When self-doubt becomes second nature, it’s no fun experience. You often second-guess yourself. You hold back. Worry and fear become your best friends.
You may likewise doubt if you should pursue your goals or even create them in the first place. This type of mentality can lead you to play it small when you really want to make a great difference in your life.
That little voice inside your mind that whispers words of shame, fear, and worry is likely untrue most of the time, but it still wreaks havoc on your nervous system and ability to put your best foot forward.
Figuring out how to build self confidence therefore seems like a distant light of hope lost in a kaleidoscope of worry and doubt.
You may also experience feelings of anxiety such as a racing heart when you’re nervous or fearsome about doing something, as another side effect of self-doubt.
Perhaps it’s primarily talking to new people that really gets you doubting your ability to be confident. Or maybe you doubt you have anything good to contribute to the chatty conversations of your coworkers. Or perhaps your inner critic frequently tells you that you’re not capable or worthy of becoming a more confident, outgoing person and that’s what holds you back the most.
I get it. I really do. Most of my days were filled with worry, anxiety, and self-doubt until recently.
How did things improve for me? I decided things needed to change. I stepped into my power by building my self-confidence and courage for life.
Like most things, learning how to build self confidence and say goodbye to self-doubt is a choice and is a skill that can be built upon.
For many, such as HSPs (highly sensitive persons), empaths, and introverts, building self confidence can be trickier than it is for most. We tend to re-energise and enjoy spending time alone and can often prioritise the feelings of others. Thus, most of what makes us anxious and doubtful stays on the other side of that front door that keeps us “safe”.
I say “safe” with a sarcastic tone because, yes, staying away from people and situations largely keeps us physically safe. It also keeps us away from conversations we’d rather avoid or are too fearful to enter (Interviews, speaking to new people, etc.).
However, that means, at least in some part, staying away from certain stimuli and situations likewise prevents us from pursuing our goals and improving our character and confidence.
Thus, there’s power in confronting our self-doubt and taking action toward what our hearts and souls truly crave behind the noise of worry, shame, and fear.
Let’s get into how to build self confidence and shrink self-doubt to set you on a journey of self-empowerment.
5 ways to boost your confidence, from a HSP
Stop seeking approval from people you don’t even know
When you meet someone new, chances are you’re going to care about what they think of you. Even the best of us do it.
However, when you care too much about what they think of you, including those you may not meet again, you enter people-pleasing territory. In other words, how you act is not completely authentic to your character and is fuelled by an often subconscious need to be liked.
A lot of the time, people-pleasing behaviours can go unnoticed. Even by the person exhibiting them. Other times we look back and think, “Why did I laugh when what they said wasn’t remotely humorous?” or “Why did I agree to those plans when I didn’t want to?”. These are classic examples of people-pleasing behaviours.
How to kick any over-the-top people-pleasing tendencies to the curb? In short – do and say what is true to you.
Ask yourself if what you’re doing is genuine. If you answer yes, and then act on those principles, you’ll inevitably find yourself caring less about what others think of you.
You’ll walk around with more confidence in the person that you are, even whilst you’re working toward growing more confidence.
You’ll start to realise being happily authentic is much more important than making a perfect impression on people who are not going to make a massive difference in your life, like strangers and acquaintances.
Walk into the room like you belong there
Walking into a room like I belong there is a massively helpful confidence building exercise I’ve learned in recent months. It has helped me to build my confidence when I’m out and about.
I’m not only talking about rooms but streets and places, too.
It’s no good for your confidence to feel inadequate in certain places. Because, at the end of the day, from a moral and natural perspective, we all belong everywhere equally.
Yes, people own homes and businesses. However, the physical foundation of every place is Mother Earth–of which we all belong.
I find this perspective extremely helpful for a confidence boost when I visit new places, such as workplaces, people’s homes, and the schoolyard.
Try it out for yourself! Keep your head up. Eyes straight ahead. You belong here as much as anyone else.
Tune into your intuition
I’m currently reading Intuition by Amisha Ghadiali. The highly-rated book gives an insightful overview of intuition i.e. our sixth sense.
My intuition was strong when I was young. I’m sure this was mainly because I was very authentic and present when I was a child like most of us are. We have yet to internalise societal pressures and expectations in childhood. Our originality and presence is at its peak. Therefore, our intuition tends to be likewise.
However, despite what some may believe, being intuitive (following your intuition) isn’t the same as being mindful and present. It’s deeper than that. It’s knowing without knowing how you know (a bit of a mouthful!).
Our intuition doesn’t require logic or reasoning but is based on personal “gut” feelings we get about people or situations.
I made many timely decisions and predictions based on my intuition as a child. I didn’t second guess my internal knowledge. As an adult, tuning into this, what you could call spiritual or true voice, takes practice.
In essence, mastering your intuition to give yourself a confidence boost entails filtering out the noise in your mind and the world and truly trusting yourself to make the right decisions.
I write about intuition quite regularly on my socials. Give me a follow for inspiration and lessons about intuition. Alternatively, I highly recommend you give “Intuition: Access Your Inner Wisdom. Trust Your Instincts. Find Your Path.” a read.
Stop trying to be somebody else
For many who lack self confidence, instead of wanting to become the best version of themselves, they’re happy staying in their comfort zones and not trying new things (no shame, I’ve been there). So, life repeats itself. Days become similar. Jobs become mundane.
Whilst living day to day without learning or testing their courage, they tend to compare themselves to others. This comparison is so common and understandable in this digital day and age when we are exposed to ideals daily.
It’s acceptable to want to be slimmer like certain celebrities on the latest, fad diet, or get our nails done like a popular influencer.
You get the gist… it’s normal to aspire to be like someone else. We subconsciously become inspired by those we follow online or admire.
However, when those aspirations become unrealistic, that’s when they can become damaging to our wellbeing.
It is much more rewarding for your psyche and life course to instead focus on bettering yourself. Take realistic small steps to success with personal goals, such as for the benefit of your fitness or career. You’ll see real results and will view yourself as your only real competition.
Pursue your goals to empower yourself every day
Hence the last and most transformative point in this blog. Goals.
Goals inspire us. They motivate us to wake up in the morning and make a real difference. They help form our life’s direction. They give us purpose.
Confidence building likely isn’t the first benefit you think of when it comes to working towards goals. But there are many ways goals can help us build our confidence.
How to build self confidence whilst working towards goals? Here’s the lowdown.
- Clear Direction and Purpose: Focusing on goals provides clarity and purpose in life.
- SMART Goal Setting: Setting Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Relevant, and Time-bound (SMART) goals breaks down larger objectives into manageable tasks to boost motivation and consistency.
- Detailed Planning: Developing a detailed plan with deadlines and milestones enhances organisation and focus.
- Resilience through Setbacks: Viewing setbacks as learning opportunities fosters resilience and adaptability.
- Consistent Action and Celebrations: Taking consistent action and celebrating small victories builds confidence in one’s ability to achieve goals.
- Visualising Success: Visualising success allows individuals to see themselves overcoming challenges and making progress.
- Embracing Change and Growth: Embracing change, acquiring new knowledge and skills, and continually learning to reinforce personal development.
- Gradual Confidence Building: By focusing on goals and taking proactive steps, individuals gradually build self-confidence and belief in their abilities, celebrating progress along the way.
With clear goals, smart planning, and consistent action, we’ll not only achieve our dreams but also strengthen our belief in ourselves.
I hope you’ve enjoyed this blog on how to build self confidence
As you navigate the road to greater self-confidence, remember this: You’re not alone. We’ve all grappled with that inner voice casting shadows of doubt. But you have the power to quiet the doubts, to embrace your worth, and to step into your strength.
Building confidence is a choice—a choice to silence doubts, trust your instincts, and be true to yourself. It’s about knowing your worth, owning your space, and pursuing your goals with determination.
Keep believing in yourself, keep pushing forward, and never forget—you are capable of greatness.
If you’re looking for products that’ll keep you on your toes whilst fulfilling your goals and growing your confidence, check out my recent blog.
